" Marriage Shock" will promote a vigorous debate over how husbands and wives can reinvent our most rigid institution so that both spouses will have marriages in which they can thrive. 224 pages.

. Heyn explains the plague of contemporary divorce - initiated by women two thirds of the time - from a revolutionary new perspective: It's not bad relationships that cause wives to walk out; nor is it boredom, time, or overblown expectations. Rather, it's the institution of marriage itself, with the myriad hidden constraints that long ago shaped it, that is behind this phenomenon. By examining the complex experience of "marriage shock," Heyn carefully charts how the institution can silently sabotage the very love and commitment a couple envision

. Elegantly argued and resounding with the voices of women and men, Marriage Shock is a ground-breaking book that will change the way we think about marriage - and about divorce. Heyn's compassionate conclusion is that marriage can be saved only when we stop trying to "fix" wives so they fit into it - and instead fix marriage to embrace and nourish wives. FROM THE CRITICS Publishers Weekly Editor and writer Heyn (The Erotic Silence of the American Wife) advocates here a radical transformation of marriage to save the institution. She presents convincing anecdotal evidence, based on interviews with young wives, that modern women are still victimized by the 17th-century ideal of a "good wife," who not only is responsible for the success of the marital union but also must give up her own ideas, pleasures and pastimes to achieve harmony with her husband.

The author presents an interesting historical overview of the good wife, who, according to Heyn, was exemplified in 17th- and 18th-century books of conduct for wives, some of which she quotes from. Heyn advises women to support one another and to maintain their own identities after marrying, rather than compromising themselves within marriage as a way of avoiding divorce. Readers should note that Heyn's advice is directed only to middle-class women-the group on which her study is based.

Library Journal The divorce rate is so high, Heyn contends, because newly married women are gripped by the vision of the self-sacrificing Victorian "angel of the house," suppressing their true personalities and needs not at the instigation of their husbands but in homage to this outmoded ideal.  Random House Publishing Group 0-679-45773-9 / 9780679457732
Hardcover Very Good Condition  Very Good Book Jacket New York 

Price: 15.75 USD